ART THERAPY DIALOGUE - May 2009

 

[Bold text = Chris,

Regular text = Chris's Guardian Angel].

 

 

Do you know, I’m nearly at the end of the Art Therapy foundation course now.

 

Are you going to apply for the MA course then?

 

No, Angel, no, I’m not. Don’t get me wrong, I am interested in Art Therapy. And I have really enjoyed the foundation course, and being around people that appreciate art like I do. No, I just don’t think it’s the right time for me yet. I’m not up to it. My art’s not good enough…

 

Your art’s plenty good enough. Anyway, focussing on technical ability is missing the point of art therapy. It’s about the symbolic expression of feeling and experience. Your art is very alive. You seem to put a lot of yourself into it.

 

Mm, that's true.

 

So, like this picture: it’s not just a fish, more a “Chris-fish”…

 

Yes! It’s an 'Embodied Image', isn’t it? The picture-making process just kind of took me over. It started out as a still life of a piece of wood! Anyway, look, the thing is, even if my art were good enough, I’m not sure I could do the therapy bit. I’m just not insightful enough. I wouldn’t know how to interpret the clients’ pictures…

 

You know full well by now that art therapy isn’t about interpreting your clients’ work. The only person really qualified to interpret a work of art is the artist themself.

 

Ok, but what about the difficult cases. I wouldn’t be able to cope with difficult clients. I can see them already: damaged, scary people full of hate, eager to spend an hour ripping me to shreds….

 

Whoa! Your inner critic is going into overdrive. Anyway, I thought you liked working with challenging cases, don’t you? You always seem to put yourself forward for them in your current job.

 

Yes, that’s true, I do. I’ve worked with violent people, sex offenders, people with paranoid schizophrenia, drug and alcohol problems. I’ve had a gun waved in my face. Yeah, thinking about it, I do like a challenge.

 

Right, so you’re not scared of difficult clients. You just haven’t got the skills and experience to do art therapy with them at the present time. That’s hardly surprising. You haven’t even started the training yet!

 

I liked what Hannah Godfrey said, when she said that she prefers to meet new clients before reading any information about them, that way she doesn’t pre-judge them in any way. I’d aim to do that too. I hate it when people are squashed down into a few sentences and a diagnosis.

 

You are so non-judgemental Chris. I think you’ve got exactly the right kind of personality to be an art therapist.

 

Well, I wish I could be so sure. Sometimes I feel like I’m just not sorted enough to be an art therapist, or any kind of therapist for that matter. I think, ‘Who am I to be helping others with their mental health?’ Look, do you remember this semi-abstract self-portrait? I did it at Jenny Mather’s workshop in February. My top half is solid and confident: I see that as a reflection of how I’ve always been successful in whatever work I do; I have good friendships, a loving partner; I’ve got ideas, a good imagination. But my roots feel very un-solid, shaky, full of holes. They feel fragile.

 

These “fragile roots”, I think perhaps it just needs you to reframe the way you think about them. I’ll give you an example. Right now you’re being very honest about yourself, and you’ve been very open on the course, in the small groups. That’s a sign of great strength, not weakness. Anyone who wants to become an art therapist needs to be open and honest, familiar with their own ‘dark side’.

 

Yes, I’m certainly a very self-aware person, and increasingly able to be open about my shadow-side. I’ve had loads of therapy over the years. And not only that, I’ve done a fair few art therapy workshops too. I feel very comfortable with the process, from the client’s point of view as it were. It gives me a kind of humility, an ability to connect with clients very much as an equal human being.

 

Is that sense of connection what you look for in your work?

 

Well, I do love those ‘Moments of Connection’ that Katie Wilson was talking about back in March; they give me a real buzz. I certainly get those moments in my job, where I’ve gone beyond the ordinary into something much deeper.

 

If you’ve got that already, why do art therapy then?

 

What really attracts me to art therapy, is working in this so-called ‘Third Space.’ Not only the inner world and the outer world, but this magical third realm where creativity occurs. I just think: what an amazing place to spend your work life! I’m not under any illusion, though. I know that ‘Aesthetic Moments’ aren’t always pleasurable. As Chris Wood said in her presentation, creative expression – it’s not always pretty. And my art’s often not pretty. Like when I did this picture of me and my ex, it was very painful, you know?

 

Mmm. I really felt your pain. That image really captured the emotional truth of your experience.

 

Yes, it did. And it was certainly very transformative for me. Doing that art work, and reflecting on it afterwards, really helped me move on.

 

It helped you in a way that just talking things through hadn’t.

 

Yes. So, the question is, why? That’s what I have been thinking about during this course: why can art be so effective, therapeutically? What’s art therapy got, that talking therapies haven’t? I think, in a way, images seem more powerful than words. Art gets closer to the emotional truth. Language is too logical and linear; feelings seem better expressed in images. The other advantage I find personally is that there’s a concrete, lasting product at the end of the session, something to keep. I see this as so important. I learn a lot during a psychotherapy session, but it often feels like it gets lost afterwards. I forget it, it’s gone. But the learning, the insight gained in an art therapy session is more likely to last, because it’s got a tangible form to hang on to.

 

You’re such a fan of art therapy! Are you quite sure you don’t want to do the MA course?

 

I never said I didn’t want to do the MA course. I just said I wasn’t ready now.

 

So what would you have to do, to be “ready”?

 

Um…..er…. I don’t know…

 

Ok, just take a moment. Visualise yourself as “ready to become an art therapist”. Really feel it in your body…..(LONG PAUSE)…. Have you got that…..? What’s the image that comes up?

 

The image that came up, is of me as an artist. I’m an artist, in my studio. There’s all my paintings, and then there’s lots of sculptures and textiles and weird constructions hanging from the ceiling. I’ve given up my job, and I’m spending time exploring my artistic side. I’m having fun. I’m doing it for me, not for anyone else.

 

So you’ve got a deep desire to explore art more thoroughly for yourself.

 

Yes. Wow, yes, that’s exactly it. I need to do art for me. Not for clients that I haven’t even met yet. I need to stop dabbling in art, and go for it. Find out what I’m capable of, artistically. That’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to find out where art can take me….

 

And then you’ll be more ready to help others, to see where art can take them.

 

Yes. I mean no. I mean, I’m sure I would be more ready, but that’s not why I’m doing it. This will be for me. I want to spend a year on an artistic journey. After that, who knows.  Listen, I need to get going, but that’s been so helpful to talk things over. Thank you.

 

You’re welcome. It’s been a real pleasure for me too. I think it would be good for us to hook up more often, ok? Stay in touch.

 

I will now. Bye!